Emotionally invested knitting

I took pictures of this hat in January but didn’t know what to say about it. I knit it for a job interview I was invited to (and was incredibly excited about) which I had three weeks to prepare for but then was cancelled two days before. The business owners simply changed their minds and decided they no longer wanted to hire anymore. I had done a lot of preparation for the role (including knitting this hat) and I was truly gutted as the opportunity was one I really wanted.

I don’t know about anyone else, but I get emotionally invested in knitting in a way that I don’t with sewing. When I wear the shawl that I knit during lockdown, I think about how cosy and comforting I found knitting it at that time. When I wear a sweater that I knit on holiday, I think of the places I visited – even though the actual trip might have been years ago. Certain sweaters make me think of Christmas. Because of the lengthy process of knitting, knits become imbued with the people and places that were present when the knitting took place. Is this the case for anyone else?

What I do know, is that this hat left a sour taste in my mouth. I have worn it quite a bit, as it goes well with several of my coats, but when I see my reflection I don’t like how pointy it is. I think it slightly misses the ‘cool’ pointy hat look and lands me somewhere between a pixie with an acorn hat, and a misguided millennial who is trying and failing to fit in with the gen z-ers. If I didn’t already have negative feelings associated with this object, I would probably love that it looks a bit pixie-ish but just, ugh.

Also, despite the whole hat being ribbed, it is somehow a bit loose? I was wearing it in Hornsea (an East Yorkshire seaside town) recently and a gust of wind blew the hat off my head! I don’t know about you, but I’ve never had a wooly hat blown away before? I don’t think it fits snugly enough despite being knit in 1×1 rib which is weird and I’m not sure there is a fix for that (gauge wasn’t off as the whole point of these patterns is to knit the size to suit the gauge that you have).

The yarn is gorgeous and very special to me as my husband bought it for me as a gift. It is Malabrigo Rios in the colour called Glitter and it is the most lovely rusty brown. The pattern is the Porty Hat by Ysolda and I bought it because it can be knit with any weight yarn and I thought it will be fab for making gifts. For now though, I just don’t love it. Time will tell if I come around. Fortunately, nothing needs to be permanent in knitting, and if I want to pull it out and use the yarn for something else, I can!